CHAPTER 39

Inthedarktheycameupthehillthroughthetimbertothenarrowpassatthetop.Theywereallloadedheavilyandtheyclimbedslowly.Thehorseshadloadstoo,packedoverthesaddles.

「Wecancutthemlooseifitisnecessary,」Pilarhadsaid.「Butwiththat,ifwecankeepit,wecanmakeanothercamp.」

「Andtherestoftheammunition?」RobertJordanhadaskedastheylashedthepacks.

「Inthosesaddlebags.」

RobertJordanfelttheweightofhisheavypack,thedraggingonhisneckfromthepullofhisjacketwithitspocketsfullofgrenades,theweightofhispistolagainsthisthigh,andthebulgingofhistrouserpocketswheretheclipsforthesubmachinegunwere.Inhismouthwasthetasteofthecoffee,inhisrighthandhecarriedthesubmachinegunandwithhislefthandhereachedandpulledupthecollarofhisjackettoeasethepullofthepackstraps.

「Inglés,」Pablosaidtohim,walkingclosebesidehiminthedark.

「What,man?」

「TheseIhavebroughtthinkthisistobesuccessfulbecauseIhavebroughtthem,」Pablosaid.「Donotsayanythingtodisillusionthem.」

「Good,」RobertJordansaid.「Butletusmakeitsuccessful.」

「Theyhavefivehorses,sabes?」Pablosaidcautiously.

「Good,」saidRobertJordan.「Wewillkeepallthehorsestogether.」

「Good,」saidPablo,andnothingmore.

Ididn』tthinkyouhadexperiencedanycompleteconversionontheroadtoTarsus,oldPablo,RobertJordanthought.No.Yourcomingbackwasmiracleenough.Idon』tthinktherewilleverbeanyproblemaboutcanonizingyou.

「WiththosefiveIwilldealwiththelowerpostaswellasSordowouldhave,」Pablosaid.「Iwillcutthewireandfallbackuponthebridgeasweconvened.」

Wewentoverthisalltenminutesago,RobertJordanthought.Iwonderwhythisnow—

「ThereisapossibilityofmakingittoGredos,」Pablosaid.「Truly,Ihavethoughtmuchofit.」

Ibelieveyou』vehadanotherflashinthelastfewminutes,RobertJordansaidtohimself.Youhavehadanotherrevelation.Butyou』renotgoingtoconvincemethatIaminvited.No,Pablo.Donotaskmetobelievetoomuch.

EversincePablohadcomeintothecaveandsaidhehadfivemenRobertJordanfeltincreasinglybetter.SeeingPabloagainhadbrokenthepatternoftragedyintowhichthewholeoperationhadseemedgroovedeversincethesnow,andsincePablohadbeenbackhefeltnotthathisluckhadturned,sincehedidnotbelieveinluck,butthatthewholethinghadturnedforthebetterandthatnowitwaspossible.Insteadofthesuretyoffailurehefeltconfidencerisinginhimasatirebeginstofillwithairfromaslowpump.Therewaslittledifferenceatfirst,althoughtherewasadefinitebeginning,aswhenthepumpstartsandtherubberofthetubecrawlsalittle,butitcamenowassteadilyasatiderisingorthesaprisinginatreeuntilhebegantofeelthefirstedgeofthatnegationofapprehensionthatoftenturnedintoactualhappinessbeforeaction.

Thiswasthegreatestgiftthathehad,thetalentthatfittedhimforwar;thatabilitynottoignorebuttodespisewhateverbadendingtherecouldbe.Thisqualitywasdestroyedbytoomuchresponsibilityforothersorthenecessityofundertakingsomethingillplannedorbadlyconceived.Forinsuchthingsthebadending,failure,couldnotbeignored.Itwasnotsimplyapossibilityofharmtoone』sself,whichcouldbeignored.Heknewhehimselfwasnothing,andheknewdeathwasnothing.Heknewthattruly,astrulyasheknewanything.Inthelastfewdayshehadlearnedthathehimself,withanotherperson,couldbeeverything.Butinsidehimselfheknewthatthiswastheexception.Thatwehavehad,hethought.InthatIhavebeenmostfortunate.Thatwasgiventome,perhaps,becauseIneveraskedforit.Thatcannotbetakenawaynorlost.Butthatisoveranddonewithnowonthismorningandwhatthereistodonowisourwork.

Andyou,hesaidtohimself,Iamgladtoseeyougettingalittlesomethingbackthatwasbadlymissingforatime.Butyouwereprettybadbackthere.Iwasashamedenoughofyou,thereforawhile.OnlyIwasyou.Therewasn』tanymetojudgeyou.Wewereallinbadshape.Youandmeandbothofus.Comeonnow.Quitthinkinglikeaschizophrenic.Oneatatime,now.You』reallrightagainnow.Butlisten,youmustnotthinkofthegirlalldayever.Youcandonothingnowtoprotectherexcepttokeepheroutofit,andthatyouaredoing.Thereareevidentlygoingtobeplentyofhorsesifyoucanbelievethesigns.Thebestthingyoucandoforheristodothejobwellandfastandgetout,andthinkingofherwillonlyhandicapyouinthis.Sodonotthinkofherever.

HavingthoughtthisouthewaiteduntilMariacameupwalkingwithPilarandRafaelandthehorses.

「Hi,guapa,」hesaidtoherinthedark,「howareyou?」

「Iamwell,Roberto,」shesaid.

「Don』tworryaboutanything,」hesaidtoherandshiftingtheguntohislefthandheputahandonhershoulder.

「Idonot,」shesaid.

「Itisallverywellorganized,」hetoldher.「Rafaelwillbewiththeewiththehorses.」

「Iwouldratherbewiththee.」

「Nay.Thehorsesiswherethouartmostuseful.」

「Good,」shesaid.「ThereIwillbe.」

Justthenoneofthehorseswhinniedandfromtheopenplacebelowtheopeningthroughtherocksahorseanswered,theneighrisingintoashrillsharplybrokenquaver.

RobertJordansawthebulkofthenewhorsesaheadinthedark.HepressedforwardandcameuptothemwithPablo.Themenwerestandingbytheirmounts.

「Salud,」RobertJordansaid.

「Salud,」theyansweredinthedark.Hecouldnotseetheirfaces.

「ThisistheIngléswhocomeswithus,」Pablosaid.「Thedynamiter.」

Noonesaidanythingtothat.Perhapstheynoddedinthedark.

「Letusgetgoing,Pablo,」onemansaid.「Soonwewillhavethedaylightonus.」

「Didyoubringanymoregrenades?」anotherasked.

「Plenty,」saidPablo.「Supplyyourselveswhenweleavetheanimals.」

「Thenletusgo,」anothersaid.「We』vebeenwaitingherehalfthenight.」

「Hola,Pilar,」anothersaidasthewomancameup.

「Quémematen,ifitisnotPepe,」Pilarsaidhuskily.「Howareyou,shepherd?」

「Good,」saidtheman.「Dentrodelagravedad.」

「Whatareyouriding?」Pilaraskedhim.

「ThegrayofPablo,」themansaid.「Itismuchhorse.」

「Comeon,」anothermansaid.「Letusgo.Thereisnogoodingossipinghere.」

「Howartthou,Elicio?」Pilarsaidtohimashemounted.

「HowwouldIbe?」hesaidrudely.「Comeon,woman,wehaveworktodo.」

Pablomountedthebigbayhorse.

「Keepthymouthsshutandfollowme,」hesaid.「Iwillleadyoutotheplacewherewewillleavethehorses.」